The Truth About Thriving: What No One Tells You About Life Harmony

For a long time, I thought thriving looked like having it all together. The impressive title. The curated calendar. The smiling photos that suggested balance and alignment and “living the dream.”

But behind the scenes? I was exhausted. Achieving. Performing. Hustling for worth in ways that looked noble—but felt hollow.

The truth about thriving is that it’s not about the highlight reel. It’s not about “balance” in the traditional sense, or some perfect equilibrium where every area of life is weighted equally. Real thriving is messier than that. Softer. Rooted. It requires presence, honesty, and a willingness to let go of what no longer fits—even when it once defined us.

That’s what this week’s podcast episode is all about. I had the honor of sitting down with Heather Stewart—transformation facilitator, coach, speaker, and host of the Back to Me Podcast—to explore what it really means to thrive. You can listen to the full conversation here: Listen to “The Truth About Thriving” on the Internally Guided Life Podcast

Thriving Is About Harmony, Not Balance

Let’s start here: Balance is a myth. At least the way it’s sold to us.

The idea that every part of life should be given equal attention at all times is unrealistic and unsustainable. Research backs this up. In a study published in the Journal of Occupational Health Psychology, researchers found that attempting to achieve perfect work-life balance actually increased stress and reduced overall satisfaction (Allen et al., 2000).

So what’s the alternative?

Heather calls it harmony. I call it integration.

Thriving happens when the different parts of your life—your work, your body, your relationships, your creativity, your purpose—start to work together, rather than compete for your energy.

It’s not about equal time. It’s about aligned energy.

Thriving Often Begins with an Ending

One of the most vulnerable truths about thriving? It usually starts in a place that doesn’t look anything like thriving at all.

It begins when you hear that quiet inner whisper that says, “This isn’t it.” And then comes the fear, the grief, the identity unraveling that happens when you dare to listen.

Heather shared her story of leaving her career as a CPA, selling her big house, and releasing the identity she had spent years building. I’ve been there too—more than once.

Change is rarely comfortable. But it’s often the threshold to something more authentic.

If you're in a season where things feel uncertain or misaligned, you're not failing. You might just be in the becoming.

Self-Honoring Is a Daily Practice, Not a Destination

So what does thriving really look like? Here’s what I’ve learned—from my own journey and from the women I coach every day:

• Thriving looks like choosing rest even when there’s more to do.

• Thriving looks like leaving the role or title that no longer fits—even when it scares you.

• Thriving looks like listening to your body, your intuition, your truth—and trusting that’s enough.

• Thriving looks like saying no to what drains you and yes to what delights you.

The key is self-awareness. According to Self-Determination Theory, when people feel autonomous, competent, and connected, they thrive (Deci & Ryan, 2000). That means the path to thriving is not outside of you—it’s within.

Tips for Cultivating Real-Life Thriving

If you’re wondering where to start, here are a few evidence-based and soul-backed practices that can support your journey:

1. Use the BECOME Framework

Heather’s Thriving Life Method breaks down thriving into six categories: Body, Emotion, Community, Occupation, Money, and Engagement. She offers a free roadmap you can download here to assess where you're most out of alignment—and where your energy is asking for attention.

2. Check in with Your Values

Research by Dr. Brené Brown and others shows that when we live out of alignment with our values, we experience disconnection and distress. Take time to revisit your core values and reflect on how your current life is reflecting—or neglecting—them.

3. Practice Self-Compassion

According to Dr. Kristin Neff, self-compassion increases resilience and emotional wellbeing, especially during times of transition. When you're shifting your identity, making changes, or facing uncertainty, speak to yourself with kindness—not judgment.

4. Give Yourself Permission to Change

Letting go of an old identity can feel like a loss. But it’s also the portal to rebirth. Be willing to update your story. You’re not stuck—you’re evolving.

Final Thoughts

The truth about thriving is that it won’t look the same for everyone. There is no formula, no timeline, no external validation that can tell you when you’ve “made it.”

But here’s what I do know:

You are allowed to outgrow roles, rhythms, and relationships. You are allowed to rest. To pivot. To explore. You are allowed to want more ease. More meaning. More you.

So if you're walking through change, questioning the old ways, or reimagining what life could look like... I see you. You're not behind. You're on the path.

And if you're ready for an honest, inspiring, and refreshingly real conversation on this topic, I hope you’ll tune into this week’s episode of The Internally Guided Life: The Truth About Thriving — with Heather Stewart

This one’s for every woman who's ever whispered to herself: There has to be more than this.

There is. And it's already within you.

Big Love,

Kayla

If you’re ready to create a life where you feel energized, balanced, and aligned with your purpose, let’s connect. Imagine waking up each day with clarity about what truly matters and the confidence to lead from a place of authenticity and strength. Schedule a free discovery call with me, and we’ll work together to uncover the tools, insights, and strategies you need to step fully into your potential and create a life you love.

I’m Kayla M. Sweet, MA, a Gallup-Certified Strengths Coach and the founder of Internally Guided Leadership Consulting LLC. I believe in the power of living in alignment with your strengths and values, and I’ve dedicated my career to helping heart-centered women do just that. With a BA in Psychology, an MA in Consciousness and Transformative Studies, and over a decade of experience in leadership, human resources, talent development, and mental health, I bring a unique blend of expertise and empathy to the work I do.

My approach is all about empowering you to reconnect with your strengths, trust your inner wisdom, and create a sense of balance that feels sustainable and true to who you are. You’re not broken, and you don’t need fixing. What you need is space to grow, support to navigate life’s transitions, and guidance to step into your worth with confidence.

If this resonates, I’d love for you to tune into my Internally Guided Life Podcast—a space where I share stories, tools, and inspiration to help you lead with purpose and create meaningful change.

Sources:

• Allen, T. D., Herst, D. E., Bruck, C. S., & Sutton, M. (2000). Consequences associated with work-to-family conflict: A review and agenda for future research. Journal of Occupational Health Psychology, 5(2), 278–308.

• Deci, E. L., & Ryan, R. M. (2000). The “what” and “why” of goal pursuits: Human needs and the self-determination of behavior. Psychological Inquiry, 11(4), 227–268.

• Neff, K. D. (2003). Self-compassion: An alternative conceptualization of a healthy attitude toward oneself. Self and Identity, 2(2), 85–101.

• Brown, B. (2010). The Gifts of Imperfection: Let Go of Who You Think You’re Supposed to Be and Embrace Who You Are.